Mam'nesia.

Am I the only mama who thinks the pressure of childbirth blew out a few brain cells?

Yes, labour.

I've never pushed so hard in my life as I did with these two kids in our nest.

I remember the midwife holding up a mirror (as a visual for 'pushing blind' through a required epidural) and all I could see was my beet red face about to pop off and fly around the room like a balloon.

Yes, I think I've lost more brain cells since having kids.

I feel like I've forgotten so much:

* how light they felt as newborns.

* what a good night's sleep looks like.

* where my wedding band disappeared to.

* what my husband already repeated to me five times.

* what the kids looked like before this moment.

(I look back at old pictures... like this one of Azriel and I, two years ago, and I don't recognise that sweet funny face of hers)!

*I forget the funny things she says... so I write them here (or Facebook!).

* how I used to dress before 'fashion for latch'n'.

* what Ben and I ever did together before kids.

I also forget how tiny my heart felt before this moment.

It's been stretching and straining to new depths each day of their little lives here.

I never want to forget that.

How much this love erases all the craziness and just sees their beauty.

brain.less, heart.full
Mel ;o)

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P.S: Note to self ~ that first 'cuddle' shot represents Azriel's most recent obsession of having her Daddy "make her smaller" by squishing her down... so she can run over and snuggle with me like a little baby.  Afterward, she runs back to Ben to stretch her "big again".
I die from the cuteness!