Things are getting a bit quiet around here since the rhythm of our days are pretty consumed with things like: playing out in the sun, reading books, visiting with friends, having meltdowns, nursing a baby... that kind of stuff.
But today I wanted to post about the blessing of birthdays.
Because.. yeah, I just had another one recently.
Much like New Years' Eve... a birthday hits me with a tangible thoughtfulness.
A time of reflection over where I'm headed - and where I've been.
Can I just say that being in your thirties is awesome.
Sure, I'm not as young as I once was...
and the physical upheaval and 'let down' after three kids has put me in a whole new realm.
(Side-note: shopping for a new summer wardrobe is like a mine-field!)
But the real blessing of ageing is learning.
Or, 'growing in wisdom'.
Life deals so many highs and lows, so many blessings and woes, and as we navigate through them we are always changed.
Learning is a humbling thing, or, maybe one needs to be humble to learn.
Either way, I think the biggest message being echoed over my heart this past year has been found in the blessing of brokenness.
It's that feeling of trying to 'unlearn' everything your world, and your heart has been preaching to you in your twenties: "look like you have it all together"
"confidence is key" "self-sufficiency is where it's at".
I'll always remember a girl saying to me years ago that she was intimidated to be my friend because I looked like I 'had it all together'. Maybe that said more about her than me... but since then I've always wanted to be more authentic. (That's why I practise posting so many confessions on this blog).
I'm a real mess.
So being in my mid-thirties is awesome because I'm learning to trust my identity with the One Who made me. In Christ alone my hope is found.
The more broken I am, the more His grace shines through.
I'm not justified by my performance.
I'm not condemned by my failures.
Because my identity is not focused on me.
(Well...that's the daily battle actually).
It's swallowed up in the LOVE of those Holy, hole-y hands that hold me.
"He must increase,
but I must decrease"
I am loved more than I can imagine, I am more broken than I can conceive.
All these truths intersect at the cross of Christ.
As I reflect on these things it's a very happy birthday to me indeed.