Welcome back to Monday Mamalogues:
'linking up to share the beauty and breakdowns of motherhood'.
Do you ever wonder if you have what it takes to be a good parent?
You know, to not screw up your kids completely?!
---
Sometimes it feels like we're navigating ourselves through a gauntlet (read: guilt.let!).
We wonder if we are engaging our kids effectively enough.
Are they playful and social - or are they the first one to bite the other kids?
We worry that we are getting enough nutrition in them.
Whether it's all organic - or macaroni and cheese!
Whether they use cloth diapers or disposable.
Attachment parenting or hyper scheduled.
Formual or breastfeed.
Homeschool, unschool, or pre-school
...the list goes on.. and on.. and on.
---
At every step and stage of child rearing there are a thousand (differing) voices hollering:
"are you a good enough parent for your child??!"
Whether they use cloth diapers or disposable.
Attachment parenting or hyper scheduled.
Formual or breastfeed.
Homeschool, unschool, or pre-school
...the list goes on.. and on.. and on.
---
At every step and stage of child rearing there are a thousand (differing) voices hollering:
"are you a good enough parent for your child??!"
And there's an ocean of books and opinions out there telling us how to 'best' parent, too.
We can find ourselves drowning in the choices and voices.
---
It's good to be reminded right about now, that kids are resilient!
No matter how we succeed (or fail) throughout this parenting journey.. our kids are growing up into their own little personalities...
And you know what? Your best is enough for them.
Perfection is not required of you.
(Granted, that 'coming-of-age' moment when you first realize that your own parents don't have ALL the answers in the world.. is a bit shocking).
But now, as I look back, it seems that the best impact a parent can have is through a role of loving availability to their child.
(For me - that love is the outflow of holding to the God of love).
Not perfection, not all the answers.
Just being there.
In all our mess, in all our weakness.
Living out love.
One day at a time.
You're doing a good job mamas.
*What's one of the best lessons your childhood taught you?*
mama Mel ;o)
---
It's good to be reminded right about now, that kids are resilient!
No matter how we succeed (or fail) throughout this parenting journey.. our kids are growing up into their own little personalities...
And you know what? Your best is enough for them.
Perfection is not required of you.
(Granted, that 'coming-of-age' moment when you first realize that your own parents don't have ALL the answers in the world.. is a bit shocking).
But now, as I look back, it seems that the best impact a parent can have is through a role of loving availability to their child.
(For me - that love is the outflow of holding to the God of love).
Not perfection, not all the answers.
Just being there.
In all our mess, in all our weakness.
Living out love.
One day at a time.
You're doing a good job mamas.
*What's one of the best lessons your childhood taught you?*
mama Mel ;o)
i think the best thing to do in parenting and in life in general is to just do what feels right in the heart. that and telling your little one that you love them. i tell Lily i love her countless times a day. if there is love, all else prevails. xo
ReplyDeleteJunior and I were just talking about this yesterday. We wonder if the choices we make are going to have the effect we hope for. I agree about lots of love, and I think lots of prayer too. For us, the most important thing we wish for our kids is that they be saved, becoming children of God. Besides that, we're trying to mold them into independent, kind and intelligent human beings. But it's not only their environment that they develop from, each person has their own personality and tendencies. It will be interesting to look back in 20 years or so...
ReplyDeleteTrue! That's a real key focus for sure... I probably should have qualified that 'living out love' and being a 'loving availability' is completely dependent on how I allow God's love to work through me, teaching truth. It will be wild to watch them grow.... ! xx
ReplyDeleteMMhhhmm... sounds a bit like a passage from the Bible - 1 Corinthians 13...the greatest of these is love, love never fails! My heart is prone to roller coasters.. I try to trust what God would have my heart do in any situation.. His is much more trustworthy. ;o) Thanks for being here with the sweetest ballerina in the land!! xx
ReplyDeleteWell said! :)
ReplyDeleteYou're such a great mommy, Mel!
ReplyDeleteI think the best lesson I have learned since becoming a parent is that making mistakes is to be expected and that I should go easy on myself. And the thing I can do that has the biggest impact on my kids is to go to them after I've made a mistake and say, 'remember when I did such and such, well, that wasn't the best decision for me to make. I think I should have handled that situation this way. I'm sorry.' Also, I ask their opinion and listen to them. I want them to feel valued and respected. Besides that a ton of love and cuddles!
xox
Oh yes... there are nights I lay in bed and wonder if we did the "right" thing by our children. Good days and bad it's all part of parenting. Children are VERY resilient and we WILL do things that may or may not result in "screwing" (your word... lol) them up, but that is what builds character no?
ReplyDelete