Hi. My name is Mel. I'm a choco'holic.
No, I haven't spent my last dime just to have one more hit.
I don't live under a bridge, snorting the 'cocoa'.
But, you know... close enough.
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In the moment when you're afforded that rare fore-sight to see that the path you're on is leading to a problem... what do you do?
At what point does a 'guilty pleasure' turn into an unhealthy addiction?
What thing in your life do you reward yourself with?
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I've been pondering those questions lately.
Why?
Because I was put on the spot.. and blurted out what I thought was a joke.
Back history: a lady at a Bible study recently asked me what I do when my day doesn't go 'according to plan'.. when l'm frustrated/angry/stressed...
"I don't know... I guess I just forget the things I wanted done that day because of the kids being crazy or whatever.." I said.
"Ok, but what do you DO because of that frustration.. yell? Throw things?" she wondered.
"Ummm.... no. I eat chocolate". I kidded back.
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Needless to say, that conversation got me sliding down a labyrinth of introspection (a favourite pastime of mine, really).
I started to notice a pattern with my sweets consumption.
It looked like this:
Exhausted by parenting? A handful of candies.
Deserving a break/reward? Another handful.
Stressed by finances? Sure, eat more sugar!
Hungry? Yep, chocolate's a food group in my books.
Sink full of dishes? Roll up sleeves.. and plunge into bag of candies.
Talk about a frightening pattern... turns out my will power is the consistency of Jell-O.
My choco-cravings are becoming my coping crutches.
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I can see the slippery slope people must find here.. that by degrees we can get to a place we never dreamt of. I could be packing on the pounds and wonder what happened.. and then keep eating to assuage the self-contempt! Um, that would suck.
I know, I know.. it's just chocolate. It's not like I'm not addicted to gambling, drugs, or Jack Daniels.
But the heart issue still has the same root:
*looking for comfort/distraction from things that trouble us.*
We all have stresses, trials, pain in this life.
We all have ways of coping.
Maybe it's time to re-evaluate if they're helping or harming us.
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So, I'm still going to eat my sweet, tasty chocolate.
(P.S ~ You're my best friend if you show up at the door with Lindt.)
But, I'm going to make sure I know why I'm eating it in that moment... reminding myself to pray through the frustrations/anxieties of the day.
"God, I cast my cares on You, for you care for me" (1 Peter 5:7).
What about you?
What's your escape plan?
Sweet toothed, soul training,
Mel ;o)
i'm one of those "bread and cheese" kinda gals, and chocolate and sweets while i like them, if someone told me i couldn't ever eat them again, i probably wouldn't panic. however...after having gibbson, i find myself really really loving dark chocolate and every once in a while if i'm having a "moment" i'll break off a piece from the freezer from my TRAY (just replenished yesterday afternoon) of banana chocolates and homemade toasted almond bark.... SCARY part is that i JUST broke off a piece and was devouring it as i was reading this post. it gets more and more eerie every day mama.... anyway, if there is no chocolate, it's iced coffee hands down, makes nearly everything better :0)
ReplyDeleteI draw! Even if it's just for 5 minutes, and is a scribble... Put them all together and you have a body of work worth reflecting on!!
ReplyDeletei. LOVE. chocolate. i must eat it every day. several times a day. how many lindt bars do i have in my fridge right now? 3. 3! chili, orange and salt. i think i will go eat eat some right now... xoxo
ReplyDeleteI'm with you on the need for chocolate to stay at an even keel :P Outta the good stuff? A tiny cup of chocolate chips will do in a pinch :P
ReplyDeleteha.. (phew) I'm in good company then! I know.. I make cookies/muffins just as a 'vehicle' for more chocolate chips... since a handful alone seems so 'savage' some days. ;o)
ReplyDeleteNooooooo, that's just mean Claudia.. !!! lol. I'll be right over! nom nom nom.
ReplyDeleteNow that's a great idea Annie... hmm... maybe I could start drawing different chocolates each day?! ;o) xx
ReplyDelete.. get out of MY head woman!! lol... no, I love that we're in sync so often, truly! Sounds like you're the healthy version of chocolate options there.. good job! xx
ReplyDeletehaha I cut down on my savagery with the fancy cup :) and hey, sometimes that's all you have time for :)
ReplyDeleteTo make you feel a bit better, sugar is as addicting as cocaine ... so you really are addicted LOL ... maybe with less significant consequences though.
ReplyDeleteumm... thanks?! Is that for real Lyds?? I feel concerned, maybe I should get eat some carrots... lol
ReplyDelete