the comeback post (husband beware).

I seriously fail at trying to force a 'serious' face.
 For those of us in relationships.. we all share some of the same issues right?  Daily learning to take the 'me' and flip it to 'we'.  Daily striving to understand... and be understood.  There's a lot of comedy and confusion along the way isn't there?  Some people like to call them love-hate relationships... but there's honestly nothing I could 'hate' about my guy Ben, that's because I choose to love him unconditionally.  I will always remember one line from a marriage book we read: "have contempt for contempt"... it stuck with me.  It also saved me a few times from stewing up a soul-starving brew of bitterness.  Once we let a little bit of contempt fester... it grows like cancer.  Have contempt for the act of contempt... stomp it out.  Talk it out.
That's it for my marriage counseling session... you can leave a tip at the door.  On the lighter note: I have prepared a 'comeback character sketch' for my husband... you may remember his hilarious treatment of me on his blog.  I'm the person that doesn't think of a good comeback till hours later.... in this case, weeks later.  While I still don't claim the writing prowess that he has for wit and insight - this is my go - at him.  Now, these are just a few of his foibles, and also my favorite things... (for now).

5 things I hate 'look past' about my man.

1. The frantic daily scavenger hunt Ben has to find his keys and wallet.  It's not like I secretly go and hide everything in a new spot each night.. but every morning he's lost them again.  What I find most amazing is that he finds a 'new' spot to lose them in 365 days of the year, who knew our house had so many cloaked corners.

2. He's such a minimalist in home decor that I get guilt pangs just looking at something 'pretty' for our home.  If it were up to him.. our place would resemble the bareness of a psych ward.

3. Ben won't.can't.refuses to sleep without the droning of a fan next to him.  I think the blast of a jet engine would lull him into a happy coma.  Meanwhile my cheeks (the ones on my face, thanks) are flapping in the gale.. as I retreat to the farthest edge of the bed before my eye sockets dry to dust.

4. Ben has an insatiable desire to 'date' a new hobby... [silk.screening / home.brewing / flute playing / clock repairing...etc] but once the warm fuzzies get stale... the poor lass is left in a dark, dusty corner... with all the others. 

5. Ben has a sock drawer that could clothe a small nation.  I think it's because they multiply like white bunnies.  Dirty, grass-stained bunnies.. that curl up in little balls all over our house.  I won't tell you how many times they've even dared to fester on our dining table - blech!

5 things I love about my man.

1. His dry wit can flip a boring conversation into comedy hour.  I often think our life could be a 'reality show' on the comedy network.  His best questions come out right before we fall asleep:
Ben - "if you could be a mythical creature, what would you be?"
"if you had to, would you club a seal?"
....they can get even weirder folks.

2. He's so genuine.. what you see is what you get - and that pushes me to keep it real too.  Even while dating I knew my test of his character would be that I didn't feel a pressure to pretend or be something for him that I wasn't....  and I didn't... so I did, say "I do".  ;o)

3. I love how he comes into the kitchen at the end of the day and says "baby, you're amazing.. look how clean you made this place"...with the gratitude of someone who was just given a million donuts.

4. The way he laughs.tickles.reads.plays.snuggles with our daughter, and explores the garden with her... and encourages her to pick up that nasty worm.

5. Lastly, but not in any way exhausting the list of why I love this guy....  I love how he smells of the grill. his pipe. or baked bread in the evenings.

 That's it.  That's not all.
Don't worry I'll save more mush for future posts (aren't you excited?).

Nite nite friends!
Mel :o)


  1. D'awww... so much SWEET in this post! Love ya!

  2. This was, in addition to being a delightful piece of writing, a wonderful tribute to the covenant relationship of husband and wife. Thank you.

  3. I kept wanting to click "Like" 'cuz I thought we were on facebook. Oops. I like reading about you guys. Really.

  4. i loved LOVED. this post!  you write in such a real, flowing, and humorous way.  always a treat to read what you put on here!

    have a lovely weekend friend!


  5. Does #4 in the 'put up withs' list mean I can have my low whistle back?


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